A little overdue, my boss finally took me to lunch today.  I decided on Benjamin's since the appetizers were so tasty at the Noveltown Mixer.  We asked his other secretary to join us and walked the 2 blocks.

She wasn't sure where we were headed, assumed Urrichio's ... poor girl had her eye on the prize, clomping down the street in her new heels, telling herself that it wasn't that far ... just a little bit more.  So she was happily surprised when we turned early at the corner of 19th and headed towards Chester.  Later she told me she was thinking "What the?  Okay, now where are they going?" She finally removed her shoes halfway down the block after we kept teasing her. 

When we arrived at Benjamin's my boss told her "Hey, no shoes, no shirt, no service!" I walked in ahead of them as she was putting her shoes back on.  Our host/server remarked "Better put your shoes on, no shoes, no service!"  Aww, two men with the same corny humor.

After we were seated the three of us scanned the menus and placed our drink orders - nothing fancy, two iced teas and a soda.  My boss then said "They don't have Burgers?!" ... this is like his prerequisite for restaurants ... so I replied "Yes they do!"  He asked "Where?!"  I pointed to Hamburger on his menu.

Then we ordered, two hamburgers - one with bacon and avocado with fries, the other with avocado and a side of potato salad, and then my choice, the Chicken Fettuccine with a recommendation from our server.  I really was having a tough time choosing, everything looked so yummy!  I couldn't decide between the Chicken Salad sandwich, Chicken Fettuccine, Chicken Pasta, or the Salmon - that's why I had to ask the server to choose.  Next time I'll have to try another dish for sure!

My boss remarked "Whatever did the Fettuccine do?  Every where I go they call him Chicken"

While we waited I grabbed a copy of Bakotopia and showed them the PETA article, he browsed the rest of the magazine and my other co-worker said "Kindra, you should be a journalist.  You like to take pictures and write". 

After enjoying the warm rolls and friendly banter, our food finally came.  Two thumbs up for the burgers, and a big thumbs up from me for the fettuccine.  I only had one roll, the fettuccine was so filling it looked like I had barely touched it! Definitely a good choice, I now have dinner!

If you haven't tried Benjamin's downtown for lunch already - go!  I'm so full I just want to go home and lay down.  That's the feeling of satisfaction.

Going back to the accident my Aunt was in and is now being sued for ... this Soundoff was published in the Bakersfield Californian on Tuesday ...

Ridiculous lawsuit

Let me see if I understood the recent article concerning two parents suing over the death of their son.

Their son, a 20-year-old man, illegally purchased and drank alcohol. He then drove a Jeep like an idiot at 100 mph, lost control and overturned the vehicle, killing himself and a friend. His vehicle was struck by another vehicle causing injury to the lady driving the other vehicle.

Now, his parents and a despicable lawyer, decide to sue the lady who struck the overturned vehicle.

What do the young man's parents and this disgusting example of an attorney not understand about personal responsibility? The young man broke the law and as a direct result of his own actions died. The judge should throw this lawsuit out of court and penalize the parents and the lawyer for filing such a ridiculous and frivolous lawsuit.

-- JOHN BELENCROFT, Bakersfield

Can I get an AMEN?!  AMEN!  Mr. Belencroft, you have made my Aunt feel just that much better about this terrible situation ... she's relieved to see that people not even related to her or who know her see the ridiculousness of this situation.

larger view

If you didn't get a chance to see the PETA protesters, have no fear!  I took photos!

I wandered down to the corner of Chester & 18th around 11:40, I was expecting the gals to already be donning just their skivvies.  Instead I was a bit disappointed, they were dressed in black and kicking back in the shade of Quizno's overhang.

Had I missed the protest?  I stood on the corner debating whether or not to cross the street and ask them.  Then I hear a man next to me thinking out loud the same thing.  Another man replied that he had heard they were going to start at 12.  Somehow a conversation began between the three of us.  The first guy was holding a video camera, he was telling us how he'd video tapped the entire thing the last time they were here, that he had so many people asking him to come over with that tape.  Then he told us that today he'd brought his Polaroid camera so he could take photos of people with the girls and sell them ...

He decided to cross the street and ask them what was going on.

The other man began talking about meat, he asked if I was a vegetarian.  I told him I wasn't, but I don't eat a lot of meat, mainly poultry - but every once in a while I can go for a good steak.  He agreed and replied, "Yeah, medium rare" ... eww.  I replied, "Well done for me, I don't want them mooing at me"  Then he went on to telling me about how he was raised on fried everything, "fried pork, fried potatoes, fried chicken, fried water" ... I added, "Fried okra."

Finally the other guy came back and let us know the PETA reps were about to cross the street, they were going to stand on the corner by Goodwill.  We crossed the street to join them. 

I felt a bit like a pervy perv watching the girls disrobe, first they removed their tops then put on sandwich boards, then they removed their bottoms.  Finally they took their places along side the other supporters who were fully clothed, but holding signs.  One girl remarked to the other, "You look really good" ... the other replied "Thanks!" 

The guy standing next to them moved closer to me and said "Hi" ... he was kinda cute actually, but being how I tend to be shy I just replied "Hi" smiled, then said "It's for a good cause" ... OMG how LAME am I?

Traffic was picking up by then, so I waited a moment before stepping off the curb in front of the girls and saying, "Hopefully I can get a good shot of you two without getting hit"  They replied, "Okay" and smiled for the camera.  Aren't they cute? 

Well, it was time for me to head back to work, so I took a flier, wished them luck, and headed back toward my office. 

Goodbye girls, until next time!

There is a Hispanic male in a pickup with stripes allegedly driving down my street right around the time school lets out.

My neighbor let me know that the neighbor across from me has been watching him do this - apparently he slows down at my house and stares at my daughter who has been constantly forgetting her house key (not anymore, I padlocked it to her backpack this morning after I was told about this man last night with the instructions that she better get her butt home from school, get inside immediately, lock the door behind her and call me or she'll be grounded!).

Why didn't my neighbor across the street tell me herself?  How long has this been going on?  I'm glad the neighbor is looking out, but she didn't tell me???  She has my phone number!  Come to think about it she hasn't talked to me for a while, she used to, now she just talks to Pumpkin.  Ever since the one day I asked her if she wanted to buy Girl Scout cookies, I was getting ready to leave and just asked her from across the street, she apologetically said no, that she had just bought some from a girl at work.  I said "Oh, okay!" and then jumped into my car and left.  Maybe she thought I was angry?  When really it was no big deal and I was just in a hurry ...

Anyway - People, don't sit around and observe creepy people staring at kids and not let their parents know.  Please notify someone!  Fortunately my neighbor told me what she had told her.

There is a young girl on my block, 6 or 7, who always seemed to just wander around alone.  When I first moved in she'd occasionally play with my daughter - a few times I even let her play inside.  There was just something about her ... I didn't trust her - sad to not trust such a young child.

She'd still come over and play, but mainly with my neighbor's son who just barely turned 5.  Some days she'd harass me a bit, asking if my daughter could play, I'd tell her "No, she has to do her chores, it's a weekday" She'd continue to harass me begging to be allowed to help her clean her room ... seriously, she'd hound me as I just firmly repeated "No" and walked from my car to my front door, let myself in and shut the door in her face.  As the year has passed her language has become more and more foul, her behavior more and more violent, and disrespectful.

Of course I attributed it to poor home life, lack of discipline - my neighbor did the same, felt sorry for her, allowed her to play with her son, even go into her house.

One day she took my daughter's bike out of the garage and began to ride it!  Without asking!  My daughter wasn't even outside!  That's the day I told her that she was not allowed in my yard period unless she was playing with my daughter.  I was tired of her throwing stuff in the "well" on my property, playing around it, in it - this is in my backyard!  Still on occasion I'd catch her heading back there, but quickly she caught on and stopped ... but she was still milling around the front of my house, playing with my neighbor's son.

Then I caught her playing a bit too rough with my neighbor's autistic son, pulling on him, pushing him, being a bully.  My daughter intercepted and after that this girl began calling her foul names when she didn't get her way.

I'd had it - I'm sorry, a child should not be calling another child (or anyone for that matter) curse words, especially when the child is just telling you that you shouldn't do something destructive or dangerous.

I stepped onto my front porch and yelled at her, told her that children should never use that kind of language ... she should act like a nice young lady, not a nasty child, that if she respected herself and others she would not use that language and that language was not tolerated anywhere near my home.

She left.

Later I saw my neighbor, she had heard me yell at the girl and was happy that I had because she really didn't want the girl coming down and playing with her son anymore, she just felt sorry for her and just didn't feel like she could say no, but she put her foot down during school hours because she did not want to advocate this girl not going to school (this girl wanders our street at all hours of the day, she does not go to school).

Seriously, her behavior was so rude and nasty the ice cream man stopped slowing down at our houses when she was in the yard!  He is a very kind man and will sometimes give the kids free candy or ice cream.  She would take it, then throw it down and tell him she didn't like that kind of candy or ice cream, that she wanted a different kind.  WHAT?!

So I was happy, she began walking past my house on the other side of the street ... sometimes she'd walk by my house and try to play in the yard with my neighbor's son, but she'd quickly be asked to leave.  (Oh did I mention she was showing up at the neighbor's with stolen cell phones and Cd's?  Her excuse - the person made her angry).

About a week ago my daughter was sitting on the front porch, waiting for me to get home (she rides her bike home, I show up about 10 - 15 minutes later, the kid chronically forgets her key - but not anymore, today I padlocked it onto her backpack!) ... anyway, the girl came into our yard.  My daughter asked her to leave, told her that I would be angry if she was in our yard, that she needed to cross the street.  The girl said she'd leave, but she was going to come back with a knife and kill my daughter.

My daughter told me what she had said when I got home, I called her school and spoke with the principal about what I should do, trying to find out if she was a student there.  She isn't and gave me alternative methods of what I should do.

I don't like being the mommy traitor ... so it took a week before I took action (well, I was also busy with the funeral and trying to figure out exactly what address the child lived at).  Then yesterday my daughter was walking home.  She said she saw the girl sitting in a neighbor's front yard holding her knee to her chest ... she was staring at her because she thought she was hurt.  The girl said "What do you think you're looking at?"  Then she came up behind my daughter, kicked her back tire and said "Fuck off!" 

I'd seen the girl walking up and down our street all afternoon alone, I'd taken the day off with a migraine, so I called the number the school had given me and was directed to another number.  It wasn't until about 8:45 that an officer showed up.  I told him what I had observed in the last year, what she had said to my daughter, etc.  Then he asked me to direct him to where I thought she lived, so I did.  He said he and his partner were going to go down there and check the living conditions and just make sure things were up to par - that I needed to call during school hours if I saw her roaming and report that to the truancy division. 

Well, that's where the can of worms was opened ...

15 minutes later another neighbor knocks on my door, apparently she'd been searching for the child because she'd run away from her mom again because she didn't want to clean up a mess.  That the mom had told the police to take her, she didn't know what to do with her.  She had a flashlight and was searching for her again.  My neighbor joined us and said she'd seen her run down our street and into an apartment where we believe another family member lives.  The other neighbor said she'd tried that place, but they weren't answering the door.  The bottom line to all this is that I initially just reported a child who threatened to kill my daughter and who wasn't going to school ... then another neighbor reported that she was roaming the streets that morning at 6:30 am in the same clothes as the day before and smelt bad ... then another neighbor reported that the child had recently confessed to her that she was being molested by the man the child and her mother live with ... and I found out that this child's mother is practically blind and feels helpless as to what she can do.

I know I did the right thing ... but I'm afraid of retaliation.  The police took my statement and the neighbor's, all of our info, including my daughters (which he called me for later, and then again to get his notes straight).  I'm a mandated reporter - but I'm also a concerned parent.  My neighbor asked if foster care is okay, she was afraid that the girl could go from this to worse.  I told her it is okay, I mean, look at my foster siblings, they are well taken care of, loved, and even with all their problems we don't give up on them.  They have to go to school, they have to go to counseling, they are not allowed to use their foul language.  It takes awhile for them to adjust ... but of course it does! 

Seriously, I understand why people don't take action ... the fear of retaliation is awful.  It's not like the police are discreet or anything about where they are getting their information.  Just mob up in front of my house and ask me for a statement next to their lite up patrol car.  Oi.  Still, I hope whatever comes from this helps that girl - she's still young.  Maybe now she won't be that kid who ends up shanking people in jail.