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"Amy Winehouse and her husband basically got into a fist fight last night which left them both bloodied and bruised. Apparently Amy's husband walked in on her cutting herself and about to do drugs with a prostitute when he intervened. The Daily Mail reports:

At around 2.30am, said guests, the fight sounded like it had restarted - then Miss Winehouse was seen sprinting down the corridor to the lift, pursued by her badly bleeding husband. One guest who got into the lift to reception at the same time said they started shouting at each other. "Amy was in floods of tears. This guy was screaming at her. She was cowering in the corner and I thought he was going to hit her. When the lift door opened, she took off across the lobby at a real pace. He was chasing after her and was about five paces behind by the time she got to the main hotel entrance."

The couple then dashed into the street. An eyewitness said: "Just after 3am, Amy came sprinting out and down the road. She was in a real state of panic. Blake was running after her, but couldn't catch up."

And like a good wife, Amy defends her husband, saying he was saving her life by beating her up:

"Blake is the best man in the world. We would never ever harm each other... I was cutting myself after he found me in our room about to do drugs with a call girl and rightly said I wasn't good enough for him. I lost it and he saved my life."

So not only did a 60 pound Amy Winehouse beat this guy up, she also outran him. Careful people, we may be dealing with the toughest man on the planet here. I hear he tames bears just by looking at them. Seriously though, this guy seems about as athletic as a grilled cheese sandwich. If you gave him a gun he'd almost be able to take on a girl scout."

as reported by the sperficial.com
Actual Story

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This morning Miss Thang made her lunch, but forgot it on the kitchen counter.  No fear, mom is here!  I revised it a little (she’d made a salami sandwich, apple, pudding, and 2 fruit snacks – I removed the pudding, a fruit snack and added fishy cracker, hehe), packed it into an insulated lunch bag, and then ran it to her school with her forgotten homework folder.

I walked into the office and set the items on the counter as I told the secretary who I was dropping them off for.  She had a strange look on her face, I thought maybe she was confused, so I explained, “She just called me from here”.  

The look now went from strange to bewildered, “You’re her mom?”

“Yes …”

“She looks just like you”

“They call her my mini-me”, seriously, I don’t have kids, I make clones.  By the way she was looking at me I had a feeling she wanted to ask how old I was, but she didn’t.  This same woman thought I was Miss Thang’s sister last year when I went to pick up her bike from the office.  The principal reassured her that I was her mom, I guess she just forgot.

Oh and she is loving her new class and teacher!  This year she was placed in the 4^th/5^th combo class.  I was also in a combo class in 4^th grade.  Thank goodness she inherited mommy’s brain instead of her bio father’s.