Looks like you might get one more of these out of me before Santa comes to Bakersfield and eats all of Bakotopia's milk and cookies. More nothing that is.

There was a great post out of Fresno that sparked a wintry-themed commentary from me. And yes, it was filled will all the grinchy sarcasm I could muster. But why not? I was pondering what Santa might leave beneath Bakersfield's Christmas tree. Give Matt a bigger office and bring more jobs to the area. I'm telling you, Bako needs many presents.

I added some fun sports videos over on the sidebar. DeMarcus Nelson got bumped up from the Bakersfield Jam to the Golden State Warriors. You can watch him getting an NBA-style foul. Then there's a wacky Condors video where mascots slugged me and face-washed my camera. They have it coming to them. I'll trip those fluffy bastards before they start their next race on the ice...

I'd been wanting to write about that taboo subject of suicide as I had been reading reports from around the country. KGET beat me to it but I still added my own two cents in a news article about the devastating affects of the economy on Bakersfield families.

Will somebody please tell me why the hell oil tanks are so close to homes here in Bakersfield, especially when they're mysteriously exploding and all oil officials can say is, well, the oil industry is hazardous... If it's so hazardous, then go build tanks of flaming oil miles from Bakersfield proper. Local media couldn't even agree where the giant tanks exploded...

Thank goodness there are teenage heroes in our midst, because I've had my fill of local alleged teenage killers on the loose.

There was just so much going on over the last week. Chowchilla chicken capers, possible orange crop freezes, lemons spilling on highways, hit-and-runs on kids, and the guy who impersonated a Bakersfield cop. Just when you thought that old toy sheriff's badge belonged in a trash can.

I've been feeling completely irresponsible, so I posted in the nonfiction group I started called The Irresponsibles about a completely whacked out trip to L.A. where I spoke with a poet, wandered into a barber shop with Jay Jones, now with Fox News in San Diego, and generally caused a ruckus.

It's all a bunch of nothing. I'll tell you more about it next week.

Don't forget to tip your Bakotopia product manager.
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N.L. BELARDES is managing editor for FaceBakersfield. His work has appeared on the homepage of CNN.com and other news sites all over America. You can purchase Lords: Part One, which describes the infamous Lords of Bakersfield. His Twitter novel, “Small Places” was recently featured in the Christian Science Monitor. His bizarre trivia book, “Random Obsessions,” is due to hit store shelves in late 2009. He’s also a contributing writer to TheNervousBreakdown.com.