http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847 Today is a great day! I am on a natural high that I usually get when I visit with my buddies, D and G. They are hifreakinlarious. Oh man. We had the staff at &nbsp;Don Vinos Italian Restaurant in Porterville&nbsp;laughing so hard. I just know that the people at the bar wished they were at our table. Or maybe not. Maybe they thought we were freaks. But I&rsquo;ll humor myself and pretend&nbsp;they were staring at us because they wanted to be us. And not because we are freaks.&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; D and G are my childhood friends. We've been friends since the third grade. We hadn't seen each other for a while and decided to meet up last night at&nbsp;Don Vinos. We sit there and catch up on our daily drama&hellip; yadda yadda. Then we start talking about my bakotopia.com blogs and how much they&rsquo;ve enjoyed reading them and which one is their favorite, etc etc. &nbsp;OH.. and they also have decided that need nicknames, because apparently D and G isn&rsquo;t good enough. So from now on, D is Dorp, and G is Goocher.&nbsp;&nbsp; Goocher mentions that she loved the Stinky Purse story. So I decide to tell them about how when another friend read that story they emailed me and said, &ldquo;hold your tongue and say this out loud I HAVE A STINKY PURSIE.&rdquo; I laughed. Hard. And loud. &nbsp; They don&rsquo;t get it. So they decide to try it to see what&rsquo;s so funny. They hold their tongue and they say&hellip;&hellip;.. &nbsp; And then it happens.. they belt out a LOUD and I mean LOUD scream.. you know the type.. the scream that usually comes right before a really LOUD and really LONG laugh. Sure as fruck. We start laughing and laughing and wailing our arms from laughing so hard.&nbsp; The restaurant was packed last night.&nbsp;It usually is on Wednesday, free wine tasting night.&nbsp;So everybody is staring at us and kind of laughing with/at us. Then the waitress comes, Y__, really sweet girl. She asks us what is so funny that we are laughing so hard. So in between breaths Dorp says, &ldquo;Tell her Twinkie, tell her&rdquo;. So in between my own laughter I tell her about the stinky purse, and the email, &ldquo;Hold your tongue and say this out loud I HAVE A STINKY PURSIE&rdquo; &nbsp; So now Y__ is laughing her ass off. And of course the people around us are wondering even more what is so funny. So this other waiter comes by and says, &ldquo;you girls are so scandalous. What in the world are you laughing about?&rdquo; SO I TELL HIM. Now he&rsquo;s cracking the fruck up and we&rsquo;re crying&hellip; from laughing so hard. Then the owner&rsquo;s son, J___ comes by and says, &ldquo;What is going here?&rdquo; So I TELL HIM. And he starts laughing his ass off. &nbsp; Thank God it was time to leave. My stomach hurt so bad from all that laughing. Oh man. I really needed my girl time. I love those girls! &nbsp; Today is a great day! I am on a natural high that I usually get when I visit with my buddies, D and G. They are hifreakinlarious. Oh man. We had the staff at &nbsp;Don Vinos Italian Restaurant in Porterville&nbsp;laughing so hard. I just know that the people at the bar wished they were at our table. Or maybe not. Maybe they thought we were freaks. But I&rsquo;ll humor myself and pretend&nbsp;they were staring at us because they wanted to be us. And not because we are freaks.&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; D and G are my childhood friends. We've been friends since the third grade. We hadn't seen each other for a while and decided to meet up last night at&nbsp;Don Vinos. We sit there and catch up on our daily drama&hellip; yadda yadda. Then we start talking about my bakotopia.com blogs and how much they&rsquo;ve enjoyed reading them and which one is their favorite, etc etc. &nbsp;OH.. and they also have decided that need nicknames, because apparently D and G isn&rsquo;t good enough. So from now on, D is Dorp, and G is Goocher.&nbsp;&nbsp; Goocher mentions that she loved the Stinky Purse story. So I decide to tell them about how when another friend read that story they emailed me and said, &ldquo;hold your tongue and say this out loud I HAVE A STINKY PURSIE.&rdquo; I laughed. Hard. And loud. &nbsp; They don&rsquo;t get it. So they decide to try it to see what&rsquo;s so funny. They hold their tongue and they say&hellip;&hellip;.. &nbsp; And then it happens.. they belt out a LOUD and I mean LOUD scream.. you know the type.. the scream that usually comes right before a really LOUD and really LONG laugh. Sure as fruck. We start laughing and laughing and wailing our arms from laughing so hard.&nbsp; The restaurant was packed last night.&nbsp;It usually is on Wednesday, free wine tasting night.&nbsp;So everybody is staring at us and kind of laughing with/at us. Then the waitress comes, Y__, really sweet girl. She asks us what is so funny that we are laughing so hard. So in between breaths Dorp says, &ldquo;Tell her Twinkie, tell her&rdquo;. So in between my own laughter I tell her about the stinky purse, and the email, &ldquo;Hold your tongue and say this out loud I HAVE A STINKY PURSIE&rdquo; &nbsp; So now Y__ is laughing her ass off. And of course the people around us are wondering even more what is so funny. So this other waiter comes by and says, &ldquo;you girls are so scandalous. What in the world are you laughing about?&rdquo; SO I TELL HIM. Now he&rsquo;s cracking the fruck up and we&rsquo;re crying&hellip; from laughing so hard. Then the owner&rsquo;s son, J___ comes by and says, &ldquo;What is going here?&rdquo; So I TELL HIM. And he starts laughing his ass off. &nbsp; Thank God it was time to leave. My stomach hurt so bad from all that laughing. Oh man. I really needed my girl time. I love those girls! &nbsp; en-us Thu, 02 Nov 2006 13:59:44 PST Dorp and Goocher??? whats' wrong with Dolce and Gabanna?! LOL http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8170 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8170 Dorp and Goocher??? whats' wrong with Dolce and Gabanna?! LOL <font style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: #ff99cc" face="Comic Sans MS" color="#800080"><strong>LMAO!  I love it!  That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time.  And of course I had to hold my tongue and say it just for the heck of it.  haha</strong></font> http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8173 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8173 <font style="BACKGROUND-COLOR: #ff99cc" face="Comic Sans MS" color="#800080"><strong>LMAO!  I love it!  That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time.  And of course I had to hold my tongue and say it just for the heck of it.  haha</strong></font> That's hilarious! I'm going to show this to Darlene as soon as I get home.<br /> <br /> Rich http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8174 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8174 That's hilarious! I'm going to show this to Darlene as soon as I get home.<br /> <br /> Rich LOL!!! Norma..YOU, &quot;D&quot;, and &quot;G&quot; ( in know who you're talking about,) are forever silly Myfa chatas... http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8175 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8175 LOL!!! Norma..YOU, &quot;D&quot;, and &quot;G&quot; ( in know who you're talking about,) are forever silly Myfa chatas... 'Member, &nbsp;Ay? We've always been like that, hu? hahah goofy, dorky, loud, obnoxious!&nbsp; I wouldn't have it any other way!<br /> <br /> Vatas Locas Forever y que!&nbsp;<br /> <br /> <br /> hahaha. I love spending time with my childhood buddies!&nbsp; OH... and BTW.. your name came up. muahahhahahaha....<br /> http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8176 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8176 'Member, &nbsp;Ay? We've always been like that, hu? hahah goofy, dorky, loud, obnoxious!&nbsp; I wouldn't have it any other way!<br /> <br /> Vatas Locas Forever y que!&nbsp;<br /> <br /> <br /> hahaha. I love spending time with my childhood buddies!&nbsp; OH... and BTW.. your name came up. muahahhahahaha....<br /> I don't have a stinky pursie.&nbsp; Never did.&nbsp; Never will.&nbsp; You guys are the stuff of local legend.&nbsp; And I do mean local.&nbsp; Great story!&nbsp; You had me laughing my ass off too, and I wasn't even there! http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8177 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8177 I don't have a stinky pursie.&nbsp; Never did.&nbsp; Never will.&nbsp; You guys are the stuff of local legend.&nbsp; And I do mean local.&nbsp; Great story!&nbsp; You had me laughing my ass off too, and I wasn't even there! your weird:) I cant wait to see you today,, its been what since what taylor street? YEARS!!!! http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8178 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8178 your weird:) I cant wait to see you today,, its been what since what taylor street? YEARS!!!! I wonder who that friend was. http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8182 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8182 I wonder who that friend was. It was a very VERY funny friend whom we'll call ...... hmmmm... what should I call&nbsp;them for the sake of this story?&nbsp;<br /> <br /> I'll have to ask them what nickname they want me to use! http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8184 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8184 It was a very VERY funny friend whom we'll call ...... hmmmm... what should I call&nbsp;them for the sake of this story?&nbsp;<br /> <br /> I'll have to ask them what nickname they want me to use! The creature. How about, THE CREATURE? http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8193 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8193 The creature. How about, THE CREATURE? hahahah&nbsp;<br /> <br /> I was thinking DUCKIE! I really liked the ducks. <br /> <br /> but ok... The CREATURE it is.<br /> <br /> My very VERY funny friend, The CREATURE&nbsp;emailed me and said,&nbsp;<br /> <strong><u><br /> &quot;Hold your tongue and say this out loud.... I have a stinky pursie&quot;</u></strong> http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8194 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8194 hahahah&nbsp;<br /> <br /> I was thinking DUCKIE! I really liked the ducks. <br /> <br /> but ok... The CREATURE it is.<br /> <br /> My very VERY funny friend, The CREATURE&nbsp;emailed me and said,&nbsp;<br /> <strong><u><br /> &quot;Hold your tongue and say this out loud.... I have a stinky pursie&quot;</u></strong> I wanna hear the stinky purse story. http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8196 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8196 I wanna hear the stinky purse story. <p><strong><font size="3">Here it is:<br /> <br /> <font color="#000080">The Funky Stank Curse<br /> <br /> <br /> OMG, I stink. Seriously. What the hell. It's been the&nbsp;past few days, I just can't shake that smell. I shower, I put on deoderant. And yet, by lunchtime... ewwww stinky. I can't smell it when I'm just sitting around. But as soon as I get ready to go somewhere.. I start walking and there it is. The stank.&nbsp;<br /> <br /> I go to lunch and hope it's not soooooo bad that everybody around me can smell it. I mean, how embarrassing. What the hell is going on with me? I get to my lunch destination and AGAIN.... not so bad. But then I get up to go back to work and there it is.. the stank. This morning as I was heading to work, I smelled again. Dammit. What the hell? No way I smell already, right?<u> I just took a damn shower.&nbsp;</u> What the hell is wrong with meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee? Eeeeeeeeeeeeeek!</font></font></strong></p> <p><strong><font color="#000080" size="3">&nbsp;Maybe it's a punishment of some sort for something I've done in a past life, or something I'm going to do in the future? Why me, though? WHY? There has to be worse people than me. Why me?&nbsp;I never used to stink. Even in my more active days, I'd run five miles and I there was no stank following me around. Is it old age setting in? Should I just get used to the fact that the stank is gonna follow me now that&nbsp;&nbsp;I'm nearing 35? <br /> <br /> Ok, fine. I have decided to come to terms with it. Shit. And then I figure, well, if I'm going to&nbsp;have the&nbsp;stank curse&nbsp;the rest of my damn life I might as well look good. I need to reapply my Mary Kay Downtown Brown lipstick and powder my nose so I can at least look somewhat decent in all my stankness.&nbsp;Maybe I'll even start wearing old lady perfume, to mask the smell. It won't be so bad. I mean things could be worse, right?<br /> <br /> So I reach into my brand new brown canvas purse I just bought from Avon and ..... it STINKS. It's not me, it's my beautiful new Avon purse that I bought with the matching shoes. It STINKS! HOORAY for my stinky brown canvas Avon purse. I love you. </font></strong></p> http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8197 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8197 <p><strong><font size="3">Here it is:<br /> <br /> <font color="#000080">The Funky Stank Curse<br /> <br /> <br /> OMG, I stink. Seriously. What the hell. It's been the&nbsp;past few days, I just can't shake that smell. I shower, I put on deoderant. And yet, by lunchtime... ewwww stinky. I can't smell it when I'm just sitting around. But as soon as I get ready to go somewhere.. I start walking and there it is. The stank.&nbsp;<br /> <br /> I go to lunch and hope it's not soooooo bad that everybody around me can smell it. I mean, how embarrassing. What the hell is going on with me? I get to my lunch destination and AGAIN.... not so bad. But then I get up to go back to work and there it is.. the stank. This morning as I was heading to work, I smelled again. Dammit. What the hell? No way I smell already, right?<u> I just took a damn shower.&nbsp;</u> What the hell is wrong with meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee? Eeeeeeeeeeeeeek!</font></font></strong></p> <p><strong><font color="#000080" size="3">&nbsp;Maybe it's a punishment of some sort for something I've done in a past life, or something I'm going to do in the future? Why me, though? WHY? There has to be worse people than me. Why me?&nbsp;I never used to stink. Even in my more active days, I'd run five miles and I there was no stank following me around. Is it old age setting in? Should I just get used to the fact that the stank is gonna follow me now that&nbsp;&nbsp;I'm nearing 35? <br /> <br /> Ok, fine. I have decided to come to terms with it. Shit. And then I figure, well, if I'm going to&nbsp;have the&nbsp;stank curse&nbsp;the rest of my damn life I might as well look good. I need to reapply my Mary Kay Downtown Brown lipstick and powder my nose so I can at least look somewhat decent in all my stankness.&nbsp;Maybe I'll even start wearing old lady perfume, to mask the smell. It won't be so bad. I mean things could be worse, right?<br /> <br /> So I reach into my brand new brown canvas purse I just bought from Avon and ..... it STINKS. It's not me, it's my beautiful new Avon purse that I bought with the matching shoes. It STINKS! HOORAY for my stinky brown canvas Avon purse. I love you. </font></strong></p> <p><font face="Comic Sans MS" color="#800080" size="4">You know, it must be a Myfa gal thing...cuz after I read your post...I held my tongue and can't believe I said it.  I had to see what the hell was so funny.  Of course, I started laughing as I could actually see Twinkie laughing her ass off.</font></p> <p><font face="Comic Sans MS" color="#800080" size="4">My poor sick husband wakes up....congested and with crispies all through his eyes.  Looks like he can turn me to stone as it's obvious that he's frustrated by my laughing.  Poor thing, he's heavily medicated with cold medication.  He wanted to know what the hell I was laughing at...of course I told him and said..."must be a California thing..."  That's his excuse for everything he thinks is weird from my side of the world.</font></p> <p><font face="Comic Sans MS" color="#800080" size="4">Dorp and Goocher?  What the f**ck!?!?  You could have come up w/ something more creative...come on Norm...I mean Twinkie.  Don't make me take the chankla out on you....in second thought, I may not want to do that..you might take it from me and RUN!  Luckily for me...I know exactly who the 3 of you are.<br /> <br /> Thanks for the laugh....Y QUE!!  LOL</font></p> http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8207 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8207 <p><font face="Comic Sans MS" color="#800080" size="4">You know, it must be a Myfa gal thing...cuz after I read your post...I held my tongue and can't believe I said it.  I had to see what the hell was so funny.  Of course, I started laughing as I could actually see Twinkie laughing her ass off.</font></p> <p><font face="Comic Sans MS" color="#800080" size="4">My poor sick husband wakes up....congested and with crispies all through his eyes.  Looks like he can turn me to stone as it's obvious that he's frustrated by my laughing.  Poor thing, he's heavily medicated with cold medication.  He wanted to know what the hell I was laughing at...of course I told him and said..."must be a California thing..."  That's his excuse for everything he thinks is weird from my side of the world.</font></p> <p><font face="Comic Sans MS" color="#800080" size="4">Dorp and Goocher?  What the f**ck!?!?  You could have come up w/ something more creative...come on Norm...I mean Twinkie.  Don't make me take the chankla out on you....in second thought, I may not want to do that..you might take it from me and RUN!  Luckily for me...I know exactly who the 3 of you are.<br /> <br /> Thanks for the laugh....Y QUE!!  LOL</font></p> i sometimes worry that it runs in the family........oh wait i think i see the super cheese signal....go to fly... i mean run http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8209 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8209 i sometimes worry that it runs in the family........oh wait i think i see the super cheese signal....go to fly... i mean run <p>HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</p> http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8214 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8214 <p>HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</p> Lili.... I mean SUPER CHEESE GIRL... ummm it DOES run in the family. hahaha<br /> <br /> <br /> akolisahola... It must be a Cali thing. We Cali girls know how to have FUN! LOL&nbsp;<br /> <br /> And you want to know where &quot;Dorp&quot; &quot;Goocher&quot; And&nbsp;&quot;Twinkie&quot; came from? They were actually and TRULY our real life Cross Country nicknames! :-)&nbsp;<br /> Compliments of Herlinda Gonzalez crazy imagination!&nbsp;One day she decided we all needed nicknames and that's what we all got stuck with! &nbsp; http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8215 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8215 Lili.... I mean SUPER CHEESE GIRL... ummm it DOES run in the family. hahaha<br /> <br /> <br /> akolisahola... It must be a Cali thing. We Cali girls know how to have FUN! LOL&nbsp;<br /> <br /> And you want to know where &quot;Dorp&quot; &quot;Goocher&quot; And&nbsp;&quot;Twinkie&quot; came from? They were actually and TRULY our real life Cross Country nicknames! :-)&nbsp;<br /> Compliments of Herlinda Gonzalez crazy imagination!&nbsp;One day she decided we all needed nicknames and that's what we all got stuck with! &nbsp; <font face="Comic Sans MS" size="3">Love reading all your stories Twinkie.<br /> <br /> Buckeye Hugs,<br /> JoAnn</font> http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8227 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8227 <font face="Comic Sans MS" size="3">Love reading all your stories Twinkie.<br /> <br /> Buckeye Hugs,<br /> JoAnn</font> Ha! http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8232 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8232 Ha! I don't normally laugh at ANYTHING involving a &quot;stinky pursie&quot;, but this is just too funny NOT to laugh at. And yes, I too, held my tongue and repeated the phrase, just for poops and snorkles.. Unfortunately, with my current chest congestion and not so feminine sounding voice, when I laughed out loud, I sounded like a drowning buffalo. <br /> <br /> I have a couple of really good friends that I hang out and do crazy things with. We've yet to venture into an Italian restaurant, but we frequently plague the staff of Mauricio's on Rosedale Highway while consuming what we call &quot;dogbutt&quot;. It's really not as disgusting as it sounds...Strawberry filled churros topped with vanilla ice cream and drizzled with caramel sauce. If you bite the end of the churro off and turn it sideways, it looks like...well...a dog's butt...<br /> <br /> Okay, time to drink my hot tea and read more blogs. I so needed the laugh this morning. Great times, great writing!!!<br /> <br /> AB http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8405 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8405 I don't normally laugh at ANYTHING involving a &quot;stinky pursie&quot;, but this is just too funny NOT to laugh at. And yes, I too, held my tongue and repeated the phrase, just for poops and snorkles.. Unfortunately, with my current chest congestion and not so feminine sounding voice, when I laughed out loud, I sounded like a drowning buffalo. <br /> <br /> I have a couple of really good friends that I hang out and do crazy things with. We've yet to venture into an Italian restaurant, but we frequently plague the staff of Mauricio's on Rosedale Highway while consuming what we call &quot;dogbutt&quot;. It's really not as disgusting as it sounds...Strawberry filled churros topped with vanilla ice cream and drizzled with caramel sauce. If you bite the end of the churro off and turn it sideways, it looks like...well...a dog's butt...<br /> <br /> Okay, time to drink my hot tea and read more blogs. I so needed the laugh this morning. Great times, great writing!!!<br /> <br /> AB Dogbutt? OMG.... hahahahha and ewwwwwwwwwww! tee hee. Actually it sounds too rich for me. I'm a Twinkie and Zinger kind of gal! :) http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8428 http://www.bakotopia.com/home/Blog/twinkie/847/#c_8428 Dogbutt? OMG.... hahahahha and ewwwwwwwwwww! tee hee. Actually it sounds too rich for me. I'm a Twinkie and Zinger kind of gal! :)