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Summer Music Festival Survival Guide
Topics: 2007, Bakotopia, music, arts, Culture, Bakersfield, Summer Music Festival Survival Guide
Posted by matt Tue May 15, 2007 16:06:31 PDT
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Every summer, music festivals of every kind imaginable pop up in some of the most god forbidden places on earth, at a time when even the devil would proclaim, “Damn, it’s freakin’ hot!”

<<Crank up the Coachella 2007 jukebox while you read!

So, why do droves of people spend insane amounts of money, to put up with insane weather and huge crowds to bow at the stage of their rock idols every year? The bonding experience between artist, fan, and fellow human, of course!

I attended my first three-day outdoor extravaganza a few weeks ago, at the Coachella Music & Arts Festival in Indio, CA on April 27-29th. 60,000 people a day, 100+ degree weather, smack dab in the middle of the desert. It was a blast.

Why was it a blast? Because I prepared myself - well, sort of…

As the monstrous festival season begins to further unleash its wrath on our pocketbooks and health, I decided to put together a little survival guide to help save you from madness, so you may enjoy yourselves. All of this info is based on my numerous festival treks and occasional foul up.

Follow these steps and you’re bound to have a goodtime (I hope):

Find a show / Pick a date

Starting about May of every year, big companies start announcing dates for all the big annual fests: , Lollapalooza, Rock The Bells, Ozzfest, Warped Tour, Bakersfield Rockin' Roots Fest, Thunder Run, etc. Whatever you’re into, there’s sure to be something to match your tastes.

Make sure you check your date and location more than 3 times before you buy the ticket. Ticketmaster, who usually run ticket sales, DO NOT give refunds based on your screw-up. Once you get the tickets, keep them out of the sun. Most tickets are layered with a thin plastic coat that will turn black when exposed to the sun for too long. This is to keep scalpers from making copies. Don’t store them in the freezer like some dummies do. Yes, someone I know actually did that once.

Location, location, location

Find out the areas you have to choose from, taking into consideration the comfort factor. For example, if you live in Bakersfield, and the Warped Tour is going to be in the coolness of Ventura during July, but the sweltering heat of Fresno, in August, go to the Ventura show. I went to the Fresno stop last year, and almost passed out on the asphalt.

Ready for the show, make a list

Even if you think it’s dumb, make a list before you head out the door on your journey. Visit the official website of the festival you’re attending and find out what the rules and regulations are. Some festivals are more lenient than others. Are outside food and drinks, backpacks, sunscreen, and cameras allowed inside? Don’t forget about baby powder, all that walking will give you a rash! Don’t worry about deodorant, you’re gonna end up stinky, not just from yourself, but from rubbing against your fellow stinkers. Most importantly, don’t forget your tickets!

Screw fashion, dress comfortably

If you’re lucky enough to have a nice body and won’t scare people off if you decide to go shirtless or in a bikini top, dress as comfortably as possible. Don’t think about wearing your brand new Ambercrombie and Fitch shirt, it will most likely be destroyed by the hot buttered spots, courtesy of your armpits. Wear comfortable shoes, shorts, and leave the flip-flops at home! Avoid black colors (unless you’re going to Ozzfest.) Oh hell, if you have a beergut and okie tan, let your freak flag fly, this is America dammit!
 
Go with cool people, in a good car

Like most people, it’s always nice to hitch a ride, so you can snore your way to and from the concert, and be fresh when you get there. Just make sure the people you decide to venture with are cool and have a working vehicle. The Grapevine is known to be a car killer, so check your fluids and tires. Pitch in for gas, and buy the driver a ten-dollar beer at the show as a show of “Thanks.” Leave early, and if you’re too lazy to drive yourself and jump in a piece o’ crap clunker, you deserve to miss the show, cheap ass!

You made it! Have enough cash?

Parking is always a hassle and costs, so make sure everyone has some duckets to pitch in for “cash-only” parking. If you rely on ATM machines, you may be in luck. Most festivals provide a string of machines, but have high service charges. Sign o’ the times man, everything costs.

Water is usually three bucks a bottle, food is about seven to eight dollars per item, and beer about six dollars minimum. If you want a souvenir shirt add another $25 bucks. I advise saving some dough just for the show months in advance. You don’t wanna be stuck outside the beer garden kicking the dirt with a bunch of broke hippies, do you?

Enjoy the show, be careful

About 3 hours into the fest, you should be buzzing, slightly burnt, but having a goodtime. There’s no reason you should be a party pooper, unless someone accidentally puked on you, or your girlfriend took a hit off a pcp laced cigarette and went berzerk. Not saying that happens everytime, but it can! Oh yeah, avoid the mosh pit if you hate jocks.

When Rage Against The Machine hit the Coachella stage before 11pm, I had already been awake and on location for 12 hours, and I still had a blast. My feet were a little sore, but thanks to my mates, the cool summer breeze that hit about 6pm, and my trusty bottle of baby powder, it was all good. Even the hippies became my friends, stink and all.

Drive home safe and get some rest

Don’t be dumb and let the tired or drunk person drive home. Find the right person and get your butts home safe, or find a cheap hotel and crash out.

When you wake up safe, and hopefully clean, you can then re-tell the story for years to come, and start saving up money for the next festival which will most likely be near your neck of the woods in about two weeks.

Repeat the process, and for chrissakes don’t forget your tickets!

Peace..

Matt

CHECK OUT PRIMO LIVE SHOTS OF THE COACHELLA 2007 BANDS!
CLICK ON THE LINK BELOW!


Article also featured in Bakotopia Magazine #2, May 18th, 2007

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Comment From: baketown

I went to the Austin City Limits Music Festival last year and looked up survival guides before I went. One thing recommeded was a large pole or umbrella to mark you spot so you don't get lost. We didn't get one and sure enough, I got lost. I almost had a panie attack searching for my friend in the sea of people. On top of it all cell phone service was hit and miss. Also, be sure to bring a big hat if you're going to be in the sun all day. There was NO shade in Austin. A hat can mean the difference between life and death. Comment From: likhy2

AWSOME!!!!!